For any relationship to move higher and deepen in closeness and intimacy, there’s got to be real trust in that relationship. The thi...
For any relationship to move higher and deepen in closeness and intimacy, there’s got to be real trust in that relationship. The thing, however, is that, trust doesn’t just happen, trust is built and maintained throughout the lifetime of a relationship. Where a couple or the parties in a relationship fail to do this, the relationships suffers. Also if they start doing it but fail to continue with time, what was once a beautiful friendship or romance may fade away just like that.
How is trust built? By committing to doing certain things regularly. They’re like exercises or habits and most times, they don’t look like that much of a big deal but those are the things that keep the trust in a relationship and make the commitment worthwhile,
Here are 3 things you must absolutely do if you want to build or maintain trust in your relationship:
Talk
How you going to be able to trust that person if you don’t talk to him and he doesn’t talk to you? You’ve really got to communicate; have conversation, air your opinions, state your disagreements, share fears and secrets.
To get to that place of trust and keep building, you’ve got to cultivate the habit of having deep and intimate discussions with each other in a relationship. As you talk to each other, you’ll get to see into that person’s mind better. You’ll get to know them and believe them better.
Please note that if your talking is going to bring you closer to each other, you’ve got be willing to vulnerable. You can’t put up a wall, always saying only the good stuff so you can look good. If you want to build trust you’ve also got to show your weakness, you dark side. When you show each other that not-so perfect side of your heart and mind, it will make the other person that you’re trusting them with something important and they will also trust you more.
You have also got to do away with judgements and accept what you’re both revealing to each other if you want to go deeper in your relationship.
Listen
You’ve got to learn to listen to each other. If you don’t listen, you won’t hear what the other party is really saying. As you listen, you will even see and hear more than the other thinks they are revealing and you’ll get to know them better. When you know them more, you can trust them more.
Have faith
You’ve really got to take a leap of faith if you want to have a close and intimate relationship with anyone. This is because people are full of contradictions and often times, you need to have faith in your intuitions about them or their promises to you, to be able to overlook some of their imperfections and believe that you can have a meaningful relationship with.
When you deposit this kind of faith in others that is not based on any things they have done, it will often make them open up more to you and try to do better.
However, you’ve got to be careful; as you put your faith in people that are untested (and even those who are), you’ve got to learn to look out for yourself. Don’t continue to put your faith in someone who has disappointed or hurt you severally. There is a time to withdraw your trust even if you are fond of that person and wish them the best.
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